Introduction: Lukas's story What happens to the survivor after someone commits suicide Emotional reactions to suicide A family's story The bargain : a deal we make with life Bargains : the long good-bye Bargains : scapegoating Bargains : "I am guilty; I am a victim." Bargains : cutting off Bargains : a miscellany The saddest bargain : "because you died, I'll die." The grand bargain : silence Reactions to an adolescent's suicide Responding Giving help by listening Getting help by talking Talking with children Living with suicide : some stories about responding Epilogue: Lukas's story : a personal summary