Whose midlife crisis is it anyway?

Midlife's a journey. Enjoy the ride. Crisis included. Never knew that life after death was far more dangerous than real life. Never in my forty years did I think my new normal would be gluing body parts back onto ghosts and hosting a houseful of dead squatters. Thank God for superglue and a strong stomach. Never thought I'd date the Grim Reaper and that I would be the one to blow it. I mean, how idiotic does one have to be to get dumped by a dude...